Lifestyle of Encouragement

Sometimes it can be very tempting to fall into the trap of comparing myself to other moms. Just the other day, for example, I was struggling at the grocery store with little miss, when I saw a mother of four walking calmly through the isles. Her son was seated securely in the front of the cart, while her three daughters stayed right by her side with their own little carts full of groceries. Meanwhile, I was trying to prevent my one-year-old from opening a bag of cookies or grabbing a random bag of crackers off the shelf. That mom seems to have it all together, what am I doing wrong? Then I start the thoughts of "Well, at least I don’t do such and such like so-and-so. Whether I view myself as being a better or worse in comparison to other mothers, the end result is always negative. I become more self-conscious about my own abilities as a mother, and I diminish my ability to truly love the other mother to whom I am comparing myself.

Perhaps you are tempted to compare yourself to other mothers from time to time. I sure am. Have you ever pointed out another mom’s actions that you disapprove of just to affirm your own choice in handling a certain situation? Or, are you stuck in the rut of trying to impress other moms because you feel like they do a much better job at mothering than you do? In both of these cases, you are tearing the body of Christ down, not building it up. I struggled with this for a long time as I am in the same circles with many wonderful mothers whom I truly admire.

God understands the temptation we feel to compare ourselves with others. But, He also knows that doing so will only bring us down. He desires us to be the best moms we can be. According to God, rather than comparing ourselves to other moms, we should be encouraging each other as women, wives and mothers. When I started doing this, I found that I became less envious, more loving, and much more self-confident as a mother. God taught me to pray for and encourage other moms when I felt tempted to make comparisons. So, when you find yourself dealing with a screaming toddler or a defiant teenager in the middle of the grocery store and spy another mom who seems to have it all under control, first ask God to help you, and then thank Him for that other mom. Ask Him to continue to watch over that mother’s family and guide her throughout her day. You could also give her a sincere compliment. Likewise, rather than justifying your own actions by pointing out another mother’s flaws, ask God to help her and show you how to encourage her. Our heavenly Father knows how much we need encouragement—let it begin with us!